On Tuesday I was at my gym and I had a great idea for a new blog post. It would be titled: VOTE where you want Kristin to go: Bali or India or both.
Part of the deal would be that I would agree to go wherever the majority voted.
I imagined this blog post and the outcome in full detail.
I imagined a deadline for the votes. I imagined who would vote for what destination. I imagined how people (you) might cheat and vote multiple times for a particular destination. (I had my 30-minute gym-rat workout so I had a good amount of time on my hands to imagine all of this in great detail.)
Then I realized (in my little fantasy) that I hoped people (you) would vote for Bali.
Hello.
Wake up and smell the coffee, Kristin.
You want to go to Bali.
Why are you hiding it from yourself?
I had no idea until I got on the phone with Kimberly last night and I had an incredible realization while chatting with her. Here it is:
I realized that I was feeling guilty for taking 60-90 days off of work.
Wow, didn’t realize that was there.
And with Kimberly’s skillful help of digging to find the real truth, I discovered that going to India felt like ‘work’.
So: if I go to a place that I don’t want to go, to a place that feels like ‘work’ then I don’t have to feel guilty about taking this much time off from my business. Because I’ll be ‘working’ on my trip instead of enjoying myself and having a 60-90 day vacation.
Wow.
Don’t mean to get all psychological on ya’ll here but that was a juicy discovery for me. And with that I felt the whole world (literally) open up before me.
The only reason I wanted to go to India was for these workshops that sound really, really cool and yet: I can’t go to a destination for a workshop. Maybe others can. But I can’t. I have to go to a place because I like the place or feel drawn to it in some way.
So I’ve started to imagine being in Bali the whole time and I’ve had a smile on my face just thinking about it. Even now I have a smile on my face writing this.
I exchanged emails with Anya’s friend Bruce who lives in Bali for part of the year. He’ll be heading back to Bali in late November.
He wrote that there are some great non-yoga workshops in Bali. (When I went online I was only finding yoga workshops in Bali and I’m not drawn to yoga these days. It’s been feeling a little too commercial for me lately.) Bruce reminded me of how very beautiful and inexpensive and peaceful it is there. We are meeting on Tuesday evening to talk about Bali.
Bali.
Oh joy.
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Congrats on this clarity!
… and you can “go psychological” on my anytime. 🙂
And… when you say yoga is feeling “commercial” you get my rankles up. And, of course, if you just not drawn to it that’s different.
While some yoga is commercialized and it is becoming more popular, to me, it’s like calling meditation commercial because the Beatles did it in 1968. Yoga (at its true core) is about Union or the experience of the Oneness of all (that is in fact the meaning of the word). Yoga is not really a trendy form of exercise. There are many authentic forms and practitioners. Maybe you haven’t met any of those yet? Maybe you do need to go to India?
Just kidding! Congrats on the joy you are obviously feeling. I’m happy for you. Much LOVE.
Jon
Hi Jon,
It’s funny, before you wrote your comment I *had* thought about changing the wording from ‘commercial’ to something different.
In fact, I did delete it once thinking that might not be PC and then changed it back because I checked in with myself and realized that ‘commercial’ is the way I have perceived it at the yoga studios I’ve practiced (I practiced at two different studios for over four years). Perhaps I went to the wrong yoga studios and am open to seeing it in its pure form in the Bay Area. Please point me in the right direction. 🙂
I’m sure if I went to India I would see the true, pure yoga.
When I do practice at home I often experience the Union with Source. But I don’t do yoga very often at home.
I love to get your rankles up as long as they come down after awhile.
Are they down yet? Ha!
🙂
Kristin