Fantasy: That I’d learn to speak Indonesian fluently before I left to go on my trip and when Wayan would pick me up from the airport, I’d greet him with my fluent Indonesian. He’d be shocked. I’d be proud. He’d drive me to my apartment and we’d chat excitedly in Indonesian on the hour-long ride from Denpasar to Ubud.
Reality: I bought an Indonesian CD/book kit for $39.95 from Amazon and listened to it maybe twice for 10 minutes in the past 3 months. Sigh. So much for that fantasy. Perhaps I’ll hire a tutor in Bali…
Fantasy: That I’d be able to use my 100,000+ miles for at least one of my air tickets.
Reality: Each time I called Delta they would have one leg of the journey available for me to use my miles but not the other and they wouldn’t let me use my miles for just one leg. My ticket ended up costing $3,000. It’s okay. There is enough money but still, at some point I would like to use my miles. This happened on my last trip too. Delta: perhaps the third trip is the charm?
Fantasy: That my to-do list would be shorter this time since it’s my second time doing an extended trip.
Reality: My to-do list is 6 pages long. I feel like I have so much to do and I’ve been worried about not getting it all done in time.
…I am feeling happier this time though. Not scared which is so much more freeing and gives me more time to devote to all I need to do to prepare to leave! I’m excited about going. No fear, which I’d experienced a lot of this time last year. Heiner sent me pictures of Kovalam, the seaside town that he lives in part time and where I’ll be staying in India while I’m doing my Ayurvedic cleanse. Kovalam looks idyllic. He’d titled his email with the Kovalam pictures: “A little preview…”
Fantasy: That I’d have a subleaser rent my place and pay for 4 months rent in full by or before Jan. 13, 2011 (one month before I leave).
Reality: My subleaser gave me a check in full for 4 months rent yesterday (Jan. 12, 2011). See, some fantasies become reality. Yay!
Yes, today is one month till I leave. Everyday is a race to the finish line: accountant meeting, manager meeting, coaching clients, hiring staff, dentist appointment, getting things prepared in my business and my life before I go away.
I can feel and hear the clock ticking.
I try to relax and trust that there is enough time to do it all and yet many nights I’m in bed. Late at night. Wide awake. Thinking of what I might be forgetting. Oftentimes I’ll get up. Out of bed. To write another item on the growing, instead of receding, to-do list.
Today I went over my to-do list with Tarra and Kathleena. I needed a reality check. Are there things on there that I could delegate?
Nope.
Everything on that list is really something that I, personally, need to do.
But having them sit with me, with my reading it aloud, gave me peace somehow.
“This isn’t too bad,” I said, after I’d read the whole list from top to bottom. (Did I mention it is 6 pages?)
“No?” Kathleena looked at me and smiled.
“No. I can definitely get this done,” I said firmly.
They both looked at me and we laughed. Of course I’ll get it done.
I have to. That clock is a-tickin’ but time is on my side. I still have 30 days. Oh. It’s 11:45pm. Make that…29 days.
About Me: 
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
You are such an inspiration. I love the part about how you/we/I create expectations/fantasies and then come down to earth/reality. Acceptance! You rule, girl. Big smiles upon thee.
Hey Kristin,
I’m surprised to hear that about Delta and frequent flyer miles. I’m flying to Jo’Burg on American miles and because of the whole “you can only book 361 days in advance” thing I called to see if I could book the legs separately. They said when flying on FFM’s that each ticket is individual. Even if I’d booked both to and from at the same time it’d have been two tickets so it wasn’t any problem at all for me to get them at two different times. And I could have used miles one way and paid the other. Anyway – if you have any American miles save them and hopefully you can do this in the future. That’s really stupid of Delta. Sorry you had to deal with that.